Forgiveness

John 8: 2-11/ Psalm 103: 1-14

Forgiveness.  That is probably the hardest thing we are called to do as Christians.  However it is one of the most important parts of our faith journey.  Forgiveness is what allows us to be a full member of the family of God and what allows us to experience the healing power of Jesus and share in the wholeness we desire most, as followers of Christ.

Christians want, more than anything to be in a full, unencumbered, unadulterated and all-encompassing relationship with Christ.  That is what makes the idea of heaven so wonderful- not that there are streets of gold and mansions or the weather is always perfect and everyone is kind but that we can finally see Jesus and be uninhibited in our relationship with him.  If all we want is a nice house we can get that here- plenty of people live in big houses.  If all we want is good weather- move to the tropics.  No- it is the relationship with Christ which we need most.

We struggle to experience that relationship fully in this life because of sin; our own and the sin of others.  People do us wrong, we feel betrayed and our feelings are hurt because we feel we are being taken advantage of.  People make mistakes, make poor choices and the people we love are hurt, families are divided, hearts are broken, and the pain is all too real. 

Then there are the pains we cause.  It isn’t just that we have to put up with the faults of others, we sin too.  We cause pain, we do things to hurt others and ourselves.  We make mistakes- sometimes on purpose, sometimes not but either way we let people down.  We let ourselves down.  We know we can do better but we fail.  Not only do we lose trust in others but we lose trust in ourselves.  Not only do others struggle to live up to our expectations but we fail to live up to our own.

Even the Apostle Paul famously says “I do what I do not want to do.”  Even he, struggled to live up to the standard he had set for himself.

Then there are the parts of life that cause us pain.  We get angry at God because someone gets sick, we age and our bodies won’t do what we want them to do, a natural disaster destroys our homes or the company we work for goes out of business.  The pain is real; the realities of the world and the choices people make have consequences.  We try to forgive and forget but that is a whole lot easier said than done.    

On Facebook this week, I asked why forgiveness is so hard and if anyone had been truly successful.  While a few had some good strategies for working on this most did not feel they were very good at forgiving themselves or others. 

I was able to relate with one friend of mine who talked about how sometimes she thinks she has been able to let something go- she thinks she has forgiven someone or some wrong in her life but when a similar situation arises that requires her to trust and act freely- the feelings of pain quickly surface all over again. Maybe we bury the feelings without really dealing with them. We think- out of sight, out of mind, which may work- until we are reminded of it again and it all comes flooding back into our minds. 

Or sometimes we think it is just easier to not forgive.  We believe that remembering an old pain and betrayal somehow protects us from being hurt again. Sometimes we think that somehow the person that hurt us is affected by our negative feelings when in all actuality the only person we are hurting is ourselves.  The anger eats at us from the inside and we are never really able to heal as long as we hold on to these pains.

It is a lot like picking at a scab.  I know that is kind of a gross analogy but it is something we have all experienced.  We ask God to heal us, help us forgive others and forgive us when we have wronged and so the scab begins to form. 

But then we think about it, we dwell on it, we wonder what if, we look at the friends we have lost, the damage to our bank accounts, we worry about what future damage will be done and how long we will have to live with the consequences and as we do that we are picking, picking, picking at the emotional scabs and the wound is re-opened and the healing that Christ offers struggles to take root because we won’t leave it alone. 

Jesus calls us to let it go- and let it heal, and as most parents do, God tells us, her children, to stop picking at it.  There is work involved in that.  It takes a lot of self-discipline and effort to acknowledge and address the source of the pain and if necessary, leave the person or situation that is causing the injury. 

This is the only way to work on rebuilding your life and giving new relationships a fresh start.  This begins with prayer, being honest with ourselves and with God about our role in the choices we make, and being willing to truly give it over to God so that healing and wholeness can result.  Not giving it to God for a moment and then taking it back but leaving it at the foot of the cross and walking away.

The good news is that forgiveness is readily available to us and God is ready and willing to help us on our journey to forgive others.  Our Psalm today reminds us that God is able to remove our sins from us- as far as the east is from the west, that God forgives your iniquities and redeems your life from the pit.  We don’t have to wallow in self-pity or shrink away in the corner afraid or ashamed. God gives us strength and courage and we are reassured that God understands our humanity and deals with us not as we deserve but with love and mercy.  God loves us and is willing to have patience with us and compassion for us.

Our gospel lesson is an example of the beauty of God’s love and willingness to forgive.  The woman in our story, has obviously committed a sin.  She and her partner have caused harm to their families and the community where they live.  There will be consequences for the choices they have made but the Scribes and the Pharisees want to be the ones to dole out this punishment so they bring her to the Temple to be judged and sentenced.  While “this woman” may have just seemed like another sinner to the Jewish leaders, Jesus sees her as much more than that.  The accusers may have never even known her name, but Jesus sees her, sees her heart and has compassion for her.   

As Jesus thinks and writes, the tension grows, the men insist that Jesus pass judgment and he does.  Barclay says that one of the things people suspect Jesus may have been writing in the sand are the sins of each of the men accusing the woman that day.  Whether or not that is true, Jesus does call them to self-reflect- take the log out of their own eyes before attempting remove the speck from this woman’s eye.  As they do, they realize they are just like her.  They have all sinned, they have all had the desires that she had, whether they acted on them or not, they have all had challenges and faults that deserved judgment.  In their quest to insist that Jesus pass judgment on her, they themselves are judged. 

Wrapped up in this one story, Jesus expresses many of the little tidbits of direction we are given throughout the New Testament.  We are told to do unto others as we would have them do to us.  If we wish for others to show us mercy when we mess up, we have to be willing to show others mercy when they mess up.  We pray each week- forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.  We pray for God to pardon, forget and wipe our slate clean and we are to do the same.  We pray that God will have a short term memory when it comes to our short comings and long term memory when it comes to the things we do well.  We want God to have mercy on us and we see, believe and trust that the love and compassion God has for us is true and unwavering but this does not come without responsibility.  As with the woman caught in adultery, she wasn’t just simply forgiven.  The forgiveness Jesus extends to her is only the beginning.  He instructs her to go and do not sin again. 

Use the opportunity God gives you for a fresh start.  Make amends where necessary but begin again, in a new life with Christ.  Allow God to heal your wounds, accept the wholeness we find in Christ and live accordingly. 

God knows we aren’t perfect and that although we try we will most likely mess up again but with repentance God will be there with open arms and the opportunity for continued healing.  Extend that same grace which you receive from Christ to yourself and to others.  Ask Christ to help you forgive and heal your broken relationships, broken hearts and broken trust so that nothing can stand in the way of living a full, loving and healed life.   Amen

Go into the world, knowing you are loved and forgiven and sharing that same love you receive from Christ with all you encounter.  It will be worth the risk to experience full healing.

Beginnings by Andy Langford and Mark Ralls is the jumping off point and provides some of the illustrations used.